I realized I have not posted on here in a while… quite a while actually. Writing terms papers does that really, too much writing on one day and BAM, don’t feel like writing anymore for the day. Hence the Metric song title as a blog title (very good song by the way, I love the songs where you like the sound, and then actually listen to the lyrics and enjoy those too). BUT I am back with a nice little poem and maybe a few thoughts somewhere in between. So this poem is a few weeks ago. I have recently began to focus on a workout now that I’m away from the barn so often, I actually need to exercise myself. I took up yoga, Vinyasa style, as it’s offered at my school. Pretty neat eh? I love it, and at the end of each class there is a meditation portion that I thoroughly enjoy. You’re not meant to think about anything in particular, but I make sure to write directly after it to have a record of that session. Sometimes I come up with great ideas, others I just feel really refreshed. But this poem was written as I was walking home from the class:
I feel the hollow
where the ribs hold up my skin
and the muscles pull them upwards
up and up
to breathe deeper
it’s obscure in there
the only light let in
from the life I need
the blood rushing around and through
I feel the vibrations
everything within is moving
sluggish, upbeat
but today it holds strong
as far as it can manage.
My toes are cold
the extremities are losing purpose
my body must be in a bad state
I feel them as numb
an odd sensation
when I can still move at will
unlike sleeping
because I have full control
if I need to be awake
in an instance I will be
and to feel the lack of reason
to feel the limbs fold in
when the most vital needs win the struggle
of circulation
chokes me.
Where does it stop
do I decide how much is needed
or will it tell me
or never stop until it is all
shut down.
Do you ever feel the sensation of just being? No focus on the world around, but only on the world running inside you. It’s magnificent; I never realized what I was taking for granted in myself. The way you breathe, the circulation of everything necessary… In this age, we’re so focused on the material, emotional feelings and such around us and I admit, I do it too. The art around me on my walls attests to that easily; the stack of clothing I just unpacked made me very happy at its presence in my hands as my own. But to step back every so often, to just feel this world without judgments, emotions or an inner dialogue really gives the chance to experience it. It’s like a next step from realizing yourself: placing yourself in the world as its not so different from the body’s rhythm. It’s too cold now to just go out an sit in a park (I don’t even know if there is a park nearby), but the few instances that I can, I just observe. In the end, it might not be the best thing to do as you do become ‘outside’ of it all but I feel it can center in a way that I have never been able to experience before. It’s great to get different views every so often, isn’t it?
Oh I need to do another post on my Halloween research, that stuff was interesting… Maybe I’ll post it tomorrow if I have the time, share my horrific and ghoulish findings 🙂
Absinthe & Ink 